Drunk On Liberal Tears: Long Overdue Post-Election Gloating

“First they ignore you. Then they laugh at you. Then they fight you. Then you win.”-Mahatma Gandhi

Two weeks have passed since the election of Donald Trump, and I’m still drunk on your liberal tears.

I worked the copy desk in the newsroom that night. Elections always mean overtime for the editorial department. I was all but resigned to the fate of yet another liberal, Democratic president. All the national polls — Huffington Post, The Guardian, MSNBC, NPR, USA Today — predicted a massive landslide for Hillary Clinton. There was no apparent chance that Trump would win at all, and that’s exactly what the political establishment wanted me to believe. Resignation, defeatism, humility.

My only sliver of hope came from a study I read earlier in the day — the only poll to accurately predict the Brexit vote was also the only poll that was predicting an election win for Trump.

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Why I’m Voting For Donald Trump

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TRIGGER WARNING: This article contains facts, evidence and the truth about presidential candidate Donald Trump and why you should vote for him. It contents have a 100% chance of causing reality shock in those thoroughly steeped in left-wing media. If you are not prepared to have your beliefs challenged, please evacuate to the nearest safe space. Common sense is advised.


“I can never apologize for the truth. I don’t mind apologizing for things. But I can’t apologize for the truth.” –Donald Trump

I embarked on the Odyssey Online as a writer knowing full well that the vast majority of its content caters to the tastes of the left-leaning, college educated, 20-something-ish, social-justice-advocate type reader. As a radical anti-feminist, racial realist and proponent of free market anarchy, I wanted to challenge this status quo with a conservative counter culture. I knew my content would be shunned, or outright attacked, but I’ve never been satisfied preaching to the choir.

That said, I’m coming out of the conservative closet. It’s a day before the election, and I’m finally saying it — I’m going to vote for Donald Trump.

According to a join study conducted by UMass Lowell and Odyssey: “By a 3-1 margin, Millennials who are likely voters prefer Democrat Hillary Clinton to Republican Donald Trump … 66 percent to 22 percent with 12 percent undecided.”

Today, I will change that. Here are all the reasons why you should put on your big-girl panties and vote for Trump:

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Odyssey’s Political Poll Shows Millennials Are Over-Educated Idiots

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The survey, conducted by the Odyssey and UMass Lowell, confirms that Millennials are widely irrational and driven by emotions, rather than pragmatism.


We commonly hold to the idea that conservatives are stupid, backwoods-dwelling, incest-bred, bigoted, racist, sexist neo-Luddites, while Liberals are cultured, erudite, pedantic and open-minded scholars. Libertarians? They’re just crazy.

Truth is, liberals are really, really stupid.

A new poll taken by Odyssey proves it. The survey covered more than 1,400 people within the ages of 18-35, AKA “the Millennials.” Millennials as a demographic group make up 26.2 percent of the United States population, or 82 million people. According to the Educational Test Service, “This generation of American workers and citizens will largely determine the shape of the American economic and social landscape of the future.” If one thing is for sure, it’s that this generation is super-duper liberal.

Oh snap.

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All Bernt Out: A Recovering Socialist’s Journey From #FeelTheBern To Anarcho-Capitalism

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One year ago, my sister introduced me to a gray, wispy-haired senator from Vermont — Bernie Sanders, championing economic equality and upon whose podium the pigeon of peace alighted. Politics before then was a disappointing parade of one establishment candidate after another. But this candidate was refreshing, invigorating. So it was my bitter love affair with socialism began.

I registered as a Democrat. I read books by Chris Hedges and Noam Chomsky. I told my friends, family, even my landlord, that I was a democratic socialist. I tried going vegan. Thirteen months from election day, I was already geared up to vote. It was the first time I’d vote in my life. Boy, did I #FeeltheBern or what?

Like my fellow Millenials, I was aware of the unholy alliance between corporations and the government. Having just graduated from a liberal arts academy, soaked in four years of a humanities education rife with Marxist rhetoric and social justice agenda, I naturally sided with the government. I didn’t know any better — before my socialist days, I simply opted out of politics. I wanted to write novels and be left alone instead.

(Looks like I was an anarchist before then, and didn’t even know it!)

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The Poison of Patriotism

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Last Monday, I was reminded of my bright, feverish zeal for my nation while driving on the thruway. I was headed home from a camping trip when the night brightened with the explosion of fireworks overhead. I was so enthralled, in fact, that I passed and watched the fireworks fade behind me without a trace on my mind.

Oh right, I thought. Today is Independence Day.

That day when the Committee of Five, a secret cabal of the most enlightened men in human history, convened and drafted the Declaration of Independence from the British empire. All the progress of the Renaissance era – Greek philosophy, religious pluralism, anti-authoritarianism – came together at last in an hour of labor, with the grand intention to give birth to the first free society of the human race.

Together, these men were the Justice League of the Enlightenment era. And with independence as their guise, they conducted the most ambitious, radical experiment in the creation of a philosophical paradise – a State that ruled by objective principles, that would never infringe on individual liberty of its citizens, a State that would be held by checks and balances. Through the Bill of Rights, which would adapt the laws to the changes of technology and culture, this free society was formulated to last forever.

They failed.

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Anarchy Can’t Work Because People Are E-e-evil!

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RUN! ANARCHISTS! Oh, wait …

“I don’t care if there’s a government or not,” a friend once told me. “I just want people to stop hating and being violent. I just want everybody to behave and get along.”

Total face-palm. If people ever learned to “behave and get along” — that is, if we were guided by moral principles and not mere laws — it would render the State obsolete (if it isn’t already, which is arguably the case). My friend expressed indifference to the idea of a stateless society, then without realizing it she described one. It appears State propaganda is so effective that even a young woman with a master’s degree can’t reason clearly.

Anarchists are accused of underestimating human evil and stupidity, which is why there must be a State to control human evil. However, if humans are evil, isn’t that a better reason to dismantle the State?

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